Who are you two and why should we read you?

Mary Dell and Lisa are writers, moms, wives and friends.  In past incarnations we have worked in television and media, on Wall Street and in politics.  Although we live in New York, Mary Dell is from Texas and Lisa is from California. We have children who have left the nest and we have high schoolers with whom we are savoring every last minute.

For two years we worked on alternate Tuesday mornings at our children’s school. After Mary Dell made the coffee and Lisa poured it we largely ignored our responsibilities in order to talk incessantly about the changes that were happening in our lives as our eldest sons were on the threshold of walking out of our thresholds.  It is a big life changing moment for every parent and we hope this blog can become a spot where parents can meet and discuss and even advise.  Sorry coffee not included.

Are you crazy? Why didn’t you move back to someplace warm?

We thought about that, but time, children, husbands and jobs all intervened.  Despite accents to the contrary we have probably become New Yorkers.

Is this just another “mommy blog” for old mommies?

Hmmm, maybe.  But if we steer the conversation away from diapers and sleep deprivation and instead ponder college admissions and when to cut your kids off the family payroll, will you join in the discussion?

I am not sure that I am your audience as my kids are still home and in high school.

If you are thinking, worrying, or just pondering what it will be like when some or all of your kids call another place home (even if it is just their grimy dorm room) then this conversation is for you.

Are you two really writing all of this?

Well, actually, no.  While we would like to claim credit for other writer’s work, there are laws against that.  The Grown and Flown Writers are a group of experienced and novice writers and a photographer who are working to make this happen. We are all empty, or nearly empty nest moms who are taking this opportunity to reflect on parenting in a way that we hope will resonate with others.

Are you doing this because you couldn’t find real jobs?

We happen to like sitting at our desks in the kitchen typing away; we hope to make THIS a real job. Plus, commuting daily into Manhattan falls into the growing category of “been there, done that” experiences.

If parents are still so important in kids lives after they leave home, why do they never call?

They just don’t always know how important we are to them, still. So, calling – not much; texting – more; video-chatting – if they want to see the family dog – frequently!

Do you really care what readers have to say or are you just going to talk about your lives and kids?

In two words, yes and no.  We care deeply about what our readers have to say and what they think.  If we didn’t care we could just send all of this back in forth between the two of us in an endless series of emails.  No, we are not just going to talk about our kids; those stories we will send back and forth between the two of us in emails.

If I write something for your blog will you publish it?

If we like it, yes!  We would love to hear your thoughts on kids leaving, kids coming back, kids leaving again and what this means to us as parents, spouses and friends. Tell us what makes you laugh or cry.  If we think other readers will be interested in your piece we will post you front and center.  If you just have a few thoughts on something you read, comments are always welcome. if you want your name attached, great, if not, that’s fine too.

Do your kids know that you are writing about them?  Do you worry they will retaliate with their own blog?

Shhhhh. We are waiting until they call us to break the news.

Checking your blog every day could become a pain, or I might just forget, would you just email/facebook me things I might be interested in?

Give us your email, tell us your interests, we will do the rest.

How do you feel about dogs?

We love them and do not love them. Mary Dell will tell you some of the ways they have changed her life and she has, in turn, used this passion to enrich others’ lives.  Lisa just sees a lot of dog hair on her family room carpet. We can agree that there will never, ever be any cats in either house.

17 Responses to FAQ

  1. Laura Strumwasser says:

    Sounds interesting. Loved so of the articles already!

  2. Laura Strumwasser says:

    Mary Dell- thanks for telling me about this at exercise class today! Articles were very entertaining!

  3. Anita says:

    Oh my gosh! Finding this conversation is amazing! Today my son and I are “celebrating” one year since he left home in New Jersey to move to California to pursue a career after his college graduation. He went from a shy little boy who clung to me constantly, to a fine, independent 23 year old young man in the blink of an eye! I’ve absolutely had those grocery store moments as all three of my children keep growing up despite all I have done to dissuade them! My “little girl” is in graduate school and has just gotten engaged to a wonderful young man, and my “baby,” at 16, is taller than me and learning to drive. My husband and I are both having a hard time adjusting to all of this! It seems to take redefining one’s role over and over as things change, keeping a sense of humor, and leaping at the chances to develop new bonds with each other. So, now I am trying to decide, should I look westward into the sunset tonight and toast my son’s success with a glass of wine, or should I break out the Legos and build something in memory of all the fun things we all used to do? Maybe I’ll do both!

    • G&F says:

      Legos and wine are a perfect combination! I love how you suggest that you are “redefining your role, keeping a sense of humor and leaping at the chances to develop new bonds.” Those are really great ideas and I appreciate you sharing them with us, too. Cheers.

  4. Bravo!
    And welcome to the blogosphere. I am looking forward to reading your posts. I can soooo relate to what you have to say.

    • G&F says:

      Annalise, so glad you visited and welcomed us to the blogosphere. Yes, we are all in this together.

  5. GrownandFlown, I so enjoyed reading some of the posts on your blog. Your posts pack in a lot of food for thought. Although I am not in your age bracket I do appreciate great writing when I see it and realize that I will one day I will be standing in your shoes when my son “leaves the nest” and so any bit of wisdom I can glean from your blog will be most welcome. Plus I totally get the NYC moving to the suburbs thing since that is the stage I am currently at. Looking forward to reading more posts and a sincere thanks for following mine! PS I found you FAQ very funny : )

  6. Bambi Lynn says:

    Cute concept, great writing!

  7. Teresa Cleveland Wendel says:

    If you like awards, I gave you one–The Inspiring Blogger. Check out the rules at:

  8. mslushly says:

    Thanks for this blog! All of the blogs I’ve found so far are more “mommy” oriented, meaning younger children (not that there’s anything wrong with that!). I’m at the other end, with my last graduating from high school next week. It’s just nice to know that I’m not alone in all this.

    • Congratulations on your baby graduating from high school. Our youngest are in 11th grade and oldest in college so we are happy to have gotten to know you. thanks for visiting and commenting.

  9. Just found your blog through Belly Button Blues. It is refreshing to find others writing about life beyond the toddler years:). I have three teenage sons – the first about to leave for college – and started blogging a couple years ago. I love being able to document our experiences and everyday life, but the thing I find most moving is when I can connect with others walking a similar path.
    I look forward to reading more!

    • Judy, it is so nice to meet you! Our oldest are in college so we have been at your spot with our kids. Very emotional taking them to college but so exciting them enter this new phase. Thanks for visiting us. We look forward to connecting with you.


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